Thursday, July 29, 2010

an ode to bewilderment

So there we were in her apartment, eating the shrimp dish that I somehow managed to conjure up. We were (or rather, She was) talking while eating, and naturally, my rate of consumption was matched only by her rate of conversation (I guess it was more of a soliloquy, but I like the alliteration). Finally I looked up and noticed how rapidly my pile of shrimp tails was growing, and in effect, was overcome by a sudden mixture of horror and confusion when it dawned on me: where was her pile of shrimp tails?!

I looked around feverishly for a few short seconds, wondering if (or perhaps hoping that) she had been discarding them or hiding them elsewhere, all the while forcefully denying the unthinkable thought that was straining to take form in my cerebral cortex.

With caution and reluctance I finally asked, "Where are your shrimp tails...?"
Sheepishly she replied, "Oh...I was hoping you wouldn't notice..."

Then it happened. Just like you see in the movies. When the protagonist reaches denouement, when all the clues you've seen in previous scenes flash together in rapid succession, when all the pieces of the mystery fall in place.

1. When thawing out the shrimp, I had asked if she wanted the tails removed, to which she had replied "I don't care". Very strange response.
2. I had noticed her picking up the shrimp backwards...not holding them by the tails but by the bodies. Also very strange.
3. She took longer than the usual allotted 4-5 seconds required for each individual shrimp ingestion. Stranger still.

I don't know whether it was more difficult to believe or to admit. My girlfriend is a shrimp-tail eater.

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